As much as it can be disappointing to have to cancel a date night, sometimes it needs to be done.
Making time for regular dates with your partner is important, even when you’re well beyond the stage of casual dating and are in a stable relationship – or even married.
But sometimes life gets in the way and you need to shuffle your plans around. Maybe your childcare has cancelled on you at the last minute, or perhaps another family matter comes up that you need to attend to.
One mum said this recently happened when she and her husband were supposed to be having a double date with a friend of hers. The other couple were supposed to be coming to their house for dinner, but plans had to change when the woman’s 19-month-old daughter came down with a cold.
Not wanting to neglect their daughter while she was ill, the dad suggested they cancel their evening so that they could take care of their little one instead. The mum agreed, but soon realised her husband had other ideas as he suggested an appalling backup plan.
In a post on Reddit, the woman said that after suggesting they cancel their dinner plans, her husband told her that his fitness group was hosting a trivia night that he’d like to go to instead while she stays at home with their daughter.
She fumed: “My logic is, if our daughter is unwell enough for us to cancel dinner with friends, and a handful as he knows, he shouldn’t be making other plans to go out to trivia with his fitness group and leave me home alone with a sick child? He should be staying home with us and helping out right?”
After being upfront and telling her husband that she’d like him to stay at home, the dad insisted he would “come home early and help tidy the house and feed her and then go out for the evening”. However, the mum argued that “wasn’t the point”.
To make matters worse, the mum is currently six weeks pregnant with the couple’s second child and has been going through “significant fatigue” in recent weeks.
She said that if she didn’t feel so “burnt out” she likely wouldn’t have a problem with her husband going out, but as it stands, she would really prefer for him to stay at home and help her.
“My husband thinks I’m being unreasonable by asking him to stay home and says I’m delusional for thinking he isn’t putting me first by going out instead of staying home,” she added.
Commenters on the post were firmly on the woman’s side, with many saying he should be the one taking care of their baby while she gets the rest she needs.
One person said: “No, he has to care about his child, because you need to rest.”
Another added: “I think it’s crazy that he just assumed he was free. Like, a mum would never! I guess his thought is that you are responsible for the baby. What’s with that?”
